The Real World Cup Rules Wednesday, June 7, 2006
Posted by jamshaid in Events, Football, Sports, World Cup 2006.add a comment
From "Men of the World" to the "Women of the world" 
{ 1. From 9 June to 9 July 2006, you should read the sports section of the
newspaper so that you are aware of what is going on regarding the World Cup,
and that way you will be able to join in the conversations. If you fail to
do this, then you will be looked at in a bad way, or you will be totally
ignored. DO NOT complain about not receiving any attention.
2. During the World Cup, the television is mine, at all times, without any
exceptions. If you even take a glimpse of the remote control, you will lose
it (your eye).
3. If you have to pass by in front of the TV during a game, I don't mind, as
long as you do it crawling on the floor and without distracting me. If you
decide to stand nude in front of the TV, make sure you put clothes on right
after because if you catch a cold, I wont have time to take you to the
doctor or look after you during the World Cup month.
4. During the games I will be blind, deaf and mute, unless I require a
refill of my drink or something to eat. You are out of your mind if you
expect me to listen to you, open the door, answer the telephone, or pick up
the baby that just fell from the second floor….it wont happen.
5. It would be a good idea for you to keep at least 2 six packs in the
fridge at all times, as well as plenty of things to nibble on, and please do
not make any funny faces to my friends when they come over to watch the
games. In return, you will be allowed to use the TV between 12am and 6am,
unless they replay a good game that I missed during the day.
6. Please, please, please!! if you see me upset because one of my teams is
losing, DO NOT say "get over it, its only a game", or "don't worry, they'll
win next time". If you say these things, you will only make me angrier and I
will love you less. Remember, you will never ever know more about football
than me and your so called "words of encouragement" will only lead to a
break up or divorce.
7. You are welcome to sit with me to watch one game and you can talk to me
during halftime but only when the commercials are on, and only if the
halftime score is pleasing me. In addition, please note I am saying "one"
game, hence do not use the World Cup as a nice cheesy excuse to "spend time
together".
8.The replays of the goals are very important. I don't care if I have seen
them or I haven't seen them, I want to see them again. Many times.
9. Tell your friends NOT to have any babies, or any other child related
parties or gatherings that requires my attendance because:
a) I will not go, b) I will not go, and c) I will not go.
10. But, if a friend of mine invites us to his house on a Sunday to watch a
game and his television and sound system is better than mine, we will be
there in a flash.
11. The daily World Cup highlights show on TV every night is just as
important as the games themselves. Do not even think about saying "but you
have already seen this…why don't you change the channel to something we
can all watch??", the reply will be: "Refer to Rule #2 of this list".
12. And finally, please save your expressions such as "Thank God the World
Cup is only every 4 years". I am immune to these words, because after this
comes the Champions League, Italian League, Spanish League, Premier League,
etc etc.
Thank you for your cooperation.
Regards,
Men of the World }
Source: socialtext
Oscars 2006 Winners! Monday, March 6, 2006
Posted by jamshaid in Events, Movies/TV.add a comment
Best picture
Winner: Crash
Brokeback Mountain
Good Night, and Good Luck
Munich
Capote
Best director
Winner: Ang Lee – Brokeback Mountain
Steven Spielberg – Munich
Paul Haggis – Crash
Bennett Miller – Capote
George Clooney – Good Night, and Good Luck
Best original screenplay
Winner: Crash
Good Night, and Good Luck
Match Point
The Squid and the Whale
Syriana
Best adapted screenplay
Winner: Brokeback Mountain
Capote
The Constant Gardener
A History of Violence
Munich
Best actress
Winner: Reese Witherspoon – Walk the Line
Dame Judi Dench – Mrs Henderson Presents
Felicity Huffman – Transamerica
Charlize Theron – North Country
Keira Knightley – Pride and Prejudice
Best cinematography
Winner: Memoirs of a Geisha
Batman Begins
Brokeback Mountain
Goodnight, and Good Luck
The New World
Best actor
Winner: Philip Seymour Hoffman – Capote
David Strathairn – Good Night, and Good Luck
Heath Ledger – Brokeback Mountain
Joaquin Phoenix – Walk the Line
Terrence Howard – Hustle and Flow
Best film editing
Winner: Crash
Cinderella Man
The Constant Gardener
Munich
Walk The Line
Best foreign language film
Winner: Tsotsi (South Africa)
Don’t Tell (Italy)
Joyeux Noel (France)
Paradise Now (Palestinian territories)
Sophie Scholl – The Final Days (Germany)
Sound editing
Winner: King Kong
Memoirs of a Geisha
War of the Worlds
Best music (song)
Winner: It’s Hard Out Here for a Pimp – Hustle and Flow
In the Deep – Crash
Travelin’ Thru – Transamerica
Lifetime Achievement Award
Director and writer Robert Altman
Best sound mixing
Winner: King Kong
The Chronicles of Narnia, the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe
Memoirs of a Geisha
Walk The Line
War of the Worlds
Best music (score)
Winner: Brokeback Mountain
The Constant Gardener
Memoirs of a Geisha
Munich
Pride and Prejudice
Best art direction
Winner: Memoirs of a Geisha
Goodnight, and Good Luck
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
King Kong
Pride and Prejudice
Best documentary feature
Winner: March of the Penguins
Darwin’s Nightmare
Enron: The Smartest Guys in the Room
Murderball
Street Fight
Best documentary short subject
Winner: A Note of Triumph: The Golden Age of Norman Corwin The Death of Kevin Carter: Casualty of the Bang Bang Club
God Sleeps in Rwanda
The Mushroom Club
Best supporting actress
Winner: Rachel Weisz – The Constant Gardener
Michelle Williams – Brokeback Mountain
Frances McDormand – North Country
Amy Adams – Junebug
Catherine Keener – Capote
Best make-up
Winner: The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe
Cinderella Man
Star Wars: Episode III – Revenge of the Sith
Best costume design
Winner: Memoirs of a Geisha
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
Mrs Henderson Presents
Pride and Prejudice
Walk The Line
Best animated short film
Winner: The Moon and the Son: An Imagined Conversation
Badgered
The Mysterious Geographic Explorations of Jasper Morello
9
One Man Band
Best short film
Winner: Six Shooter
Ausreisser (The Runaway)
Cashback
The Last Farm
Our Time is Up
Best animated feature film
Winner: Wallace and Gromit in the Curse of the Were-Rabbit
Howl’s Moving Castle
Corpse Bride
Best visual effects
Winner: King Kong
The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe
War of the Worlds
Best supporting actor
Winner: George Clooney – Syriana
Jake Gyllenhaal – Brokeback Mountain
Paul Giamatti – Cinderella Man
Matt Dillon – Crash
William Hurt – A History of Violence
Links: Oscars
Academy of Motion Arts And Sciences
Oscars Photos
Oscars Video
